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OPINION> Alexis Hooi
The single question on everyone's lips
By Alexis Hooi (China Daily)
Updated: 2008-01-22 21:47

My single status has become a tasty topic for lunchtime buddies. "So what's your type?" they ask.

I usually work the night shift and getting up before noon can be a drag, but the chance to mingle and brush up my Mandarin is invaluable, especially when things get so personal.

"So-and-so knows some nice girls. He can hook you up."

"Bu shi lao niu chi nen cao ba?" - literally, "You're not an old ox rummaging for tender, young grass right?" I.e. "You're not a cradle-snatcher, are you?!"

Being Singaporean Chinese, a rudimentary grasp of Mandarin allows me a decent conversation but it is the discovery of such nuances in a familiar language that delights me.

And other than the fact that I'll have to tread carefully when dating girls to avoid fueling the rumor mill - these proddings are probably nothing compared to what I'll be facing back home, sans Mandarin lessons.

I'll be going back to sunny Singapore for the Spring Festival, or what is more popularly known in the tropics as the Chinese New Year.

Think reunion dinners and family gatherings, where relatives get together and I'm one of the only older cousins still single.

What makes it worse is the practice of giving out red packets, or hong bao, containing cash to wish recipients good luck, health and happiness.

Married couples hand out the hong bao to the singles, regardless of age. Getting it from my brother, let alone my cousins, can be particularly embarrassing at the ripe age of 32.

And to think I really looked forward to all that pocket money as a kid.

I guess the Chinese really know how to put on the screws when it comes to family and the paramount importance of progeny.

It would certainly be interesting to see how it's done here on the mainland.

Another colleague was sweet enough to extend an invitation should I change my mind and stay in the capital for the coming holidays.

"Come spend the Spring Festival at my place. I know someone nice you can meet."

Still, it is small, thoughtful gestures like these that make Beijing a home away from home. It would be a treat and honor to share a meal with a family here. And it helps too that one of the requirements of being in the news business is curiosity - and a really thick hide.

Strangely enough though, this will be one Chinese New Year where I'm actually not in Singapore, but going back to celebrate it. Previously, the string of days off made for a really great excuse to jet off to some ski resort.

So thick hide it is as I prepare to make my way back. There's still always the feasting, drinking and gambling.

(China Daily 01/22/2008 page20)

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